YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW ME }

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Hi all,

Today i woke up with my left eye swollen. Alamak. Painful. Thats because i kept rubbing my eyes yesterday night. I have this habit since i was young, hahaha. haik haik. Sometimes i really dunno how to take care of myself....

Well, chucking aside my "old and rusty" mind of this 22 year old "girl", Sometimes when i think about the past, i missed my girlfriends so badly!!! Where are all of you!!! Qing!!! hahaha! Remember our shopping spree at Orchard! and remember liquid room! Kaleen!!! My shopping, clubbing and gossiping kaki too and bioing guys days! haha! hmm well, that was 3 years ago when i was 19-20, lol. Elain!!! Remember our gossips and all the laughters and nonsenses in NYP with all the lecturers!!! and our followers!! haha our bo chap study attitude and always asking **** to tap card for us or even we tap and go off to find our own entertainment or even***! Remember our singing session at **** and shopping arcade incident!! So bad right! Lucky din get ***, haha! haha so funny man! Think i kinda influence you to my bo chap attitude and alot of bad things.. so sorry... haha... My friends or those who are closer to me always says i am so dramatic and with so many wacky ideas.. haha which is good i think cuz all these really amuse me and makes my day (if succeed la,haha) Well was around 19-21 years old what u expect my behaviour to be? haha..

However, those who dun really knows me, they might think i am reserved or quiet or whatever.. not sociable or whatever.. well, thats too bad. We just couldn't click. Perhaps i prefer clicking with people who knows how to jokes.. appreciate jokes like me.. haha.. some people just can't take it and we as jokers, may end up offending them.
In life, we can't please everyone. Thats why i really love, treasure and appreciate those who cares and are there for me.

O Elain and yes! Our pontan wacky ideas, haha! and always searching for nice food worth to eat all around the campus, haha! and the way we appreciate food that goes into our mouth was really deem incredible by the rest of them! We really knows how to escape our way off back in school then, making all of them blur blur. haha! So fun! Remember those days i dream so much during lesson or even discussion.. I know i haven chip in as much as you guys do but i am quite ting hua though, haha! Miss those swimming pools and gyming days too.. (Elain you know right) I miss those carefree moments where we can talk about anything under the sun! So happy!! And recently, Ivy and Co. Hahaha. Sometimes i prefer talking to my gfs cuz they jus know me so welllllllllll....... But well, now that we are all busy with our work and we hardly get to meet one another but am so happy to hear from u all thru smses... O well, we get to meet different people in different stages of our life.. Sometimes muz learn how to let go. haha wad am i toking....

Well, that was all in 2005.......... hmm i have used to talk frankly and say whatever comes from my mind, so far so good. Maybe-because-although i don't offend others even though words just shot out of my mouth. I dun want others to tell me what to do, what to say, when to speak or even when to eat cuz i think i am old enough to think. But if one day someone really tells me, thats unique which i really appreciate. i dun really think how other people feels cuz i think that is the time when i always present the sincere side of me. I dun wanna fake in order to make others happy. My friends accept me as who i am. They respect me. If i were to change, perhaps my relationship with them would dither. So far, my friends accept me as who am i- jesslyn. I dun want to think so much in order to make someone happy. If she/he cannot accept me, den so be it.

Anyway, i would wanna behave how gals behave for my age. My girlfriends age range from 20-25 bah... I don't need constant reminder from anyone. Be it friends, family, whoever. cuz i know how to think, even if i don't know, i will learn from experience myself. I want to "experience" experiences, not reminder. Its through those experiences and communications with people that makes me change to be a better person.
I would wanna be friends with people who is sincere and accepts me as the one and only Jesslyn Chen. I hate comparison. I detest bossy people. However, they do amuse me somehow and fortuately, i finds it entertaining though~ This is the way to deal with it because in life, everyone will meet different kinds of people.. i have my fair share, but of course there will be more. Anyway, you can say that they are unique too cos different people have different mindset, character and their way of doing things. See it this way, you will feel better. Thats how to be happy!!

I would wanna meet people who amuse me though. Please show face. Ha.

I am a heartless creature if that person makes me to. I won't pity anyone if i think you deserve it. Go ahead and hate me if you want. Now that you know, you wouldn't wanna know me. =/

{ 11:26 AM }